Today I saw my first bhojpuri movie, and it was an amazing experience that I don't think I'll be forgetting anytime soon.
To answer the first question. Why bhojpuri movies?
The very concept of bhojpuri movies has fascinated me. I mean, seeing something that can be actually more in-your-face than bollywood, with all those hoardings and posters of actors dancing away with fat babes in fields having ridiculous titles such as "Kab Hoga Hamaar Biyaah" ( a common enough conundrum in North India apparently) had an irresistable pull for me. Yet, I never really got around to actually dragging myself to one of those bhaiyya-full theatres till I saw the promos of Munna Bajrangi.
Munna written in green, and Bajrangi written in saffron, with munna apparently a Muslim villain, and Bajrangi the saffron hero. I was entranced, and expected a VHP-RSS-Sangh Parivar financed movie (the amount of advertising and publicity the movie had certainly supported the belief) that showed saffron activists ripping muslim foetuses from stomachs and feasting on them and so on, but the movie turned out to be a big surprise.
Shockingly, Munna Bajrangi is about two friends, a (shia?) Muslim named Munna and a true-blue-Bihari Bajrangi. Munna and Bajrangi join forces to defeat 'Babua', the local crime lord who ravages Bihar's fields and womens with equal ferocity. In the promo both Munna and Bajrangi looked very promising, intense, serious expression that promised good performances and nice action scenes, but when I actually watched the movie, Munna outshadowed Bajrangi by a MILE, I mean, the guy is CHARISMATIC!! From the moment he entered the scene, the audience was howling and rooting for him, cheering "Munna! Munna!" (with me and Raoul joining the voices later on) and shrieking with joy during his action scenes.
I was touched. I mean, really, really, touched. We all think that people have these prejudices and communalism is omnipotent, and that the villages and rural areas are the most sensitive, but if the response this movie got was anything to go by, my perception got a serious kick in the ass.
Another shock was bhojpuri. I always imagined it to be some strange language with every word ending with "va", but if you know even decent Hindi, then you will have absolutely no problem understanding bhojpuri.
I came to the conclusion that I'm as much a sucker for patriotic and sentimental stuff as when I was six years old, sobbing my eyes out watching Poorab aur Paschim.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Thursday, June 5, 2008
Monday, June 2, 2008
Jimmyism
This post is rather delayed, but finally my fingers wouldn't stay quiet any longer!! This once in a lifetime experience has to be narrated.
Date: 10th May 2008
Venue: Cinemax Goregaon
Company: Family
Mission: Survive Jimmy
And yes. It was in these very circumstances that I attained Nirvana.
Albeit for a brief two hours.
When the "movie" (calling Jimmy a movie is like calling a gyrocopter a crab's spleen; it's just not 'it') began, and the opening credits showed Jimmy's silhouette rapidly flexing his thighs in all imaginable directions, I immediately realized that what I was witnessing was not an ordinary experience, it was something else, it was something different, it was an experience on a different plane of existence. And as the minutes progressed, my poor five senses, mundane creations as they are, finally succumbed and I felt myself being taken away to a far off place, experiencing a state of transcendence that would make Vishwamitra jealous.
When I finally came to, about two hours later, I knew that this was an experience that could be had only once in a lifetime. My mind was filled with the Truth, that terrible, all conquering thing known as the Truth, and I am here to share it with you.
Concentrate every fibre of your existence on the fundamental question that forms the very basis of Jimmyism and you will know it for your self:
Why Not Jimmy.
क्यों नहीं जिम्मी।
வி நாட் ஜிம்மி.
Mi-Moh Shaanti Shaanti Meee-Mooohhh.
Date: 10th May 2008
Venue: Cinemax Goregaon
Company: Family
Mission: Survive Jimmy
And yes. It was in these very circumstances that I attained Nirvana.
Albeit for a brief two hours.
When the "movie" (calling Jimmy a movie is like calling a gyrocopter a crab's spleen; it's just not 'it') began, and the opening credits showed Jimmy's silhouette rapidly flexing his thighs in all imaginable directions, I immediately realized that what I was witnessing was not an ordinary experience, it was something else, it was something different, it was an experience on a different plane of existence. And as the minutes progressed, my poor five senses, mundane creations as they are, finally succumbed and I felt myself being taken away to a far off place, experiencing a state of transcendence that would make Vishwamitra jealous.
When I finally came to, about two hours later, I knew that this was an experience that could be had only once in a lifetime. My mind was filled with the Truth, that terrible, all conquering thing known as the Truth, and I am here to share it with you.
Concentrate every fibre of your existence on the fundamental question that forms the very basis of Jimmyism and you will know it for your self:
Why Not Jimmy.
क्यों नहीं जिम्मी।
வி நாட் ஜிம்மி.
Mi-Moh Shaanti Shaanti Meee-Mooohhh.
Operation Orissa
Come on guys. Let's admit it. There is nothing called the State of Orissa.
It's a conspiracy. The government of India felt squeamish after Independence and they decided to colour a bit of the Bay of Bengal and call it Orissa so that India would look bigger and more 'in-shape'.
But they can't fool us any longer! Their lies are slowly coming to the fore. They can't fool us anymore about a State that doesn't exist.
Now I know you'll think I've finally gone nuts. But wait! Before you scoff at my seeming delinquency, ask yourselves the following questions:
Have you ever been to Orissa?
Have you ever come back from Orissa?
Have you ever planned to go to Orissa?
Have you ever met anyone from Orissa?
Do you have any idea of what goes on in Orissa?
Ever wonder why it never comes in the news?
Ever wonder why almost everyone connected to Orissa is named 'Patnaik'?
Ever wonder why the government says that all kinds of natural calamities take place there and take hefty donations as foreign aid?
Ever wonder what the hell they speak in Orissa?
If you have answered the majority of these questions with a blank, then you must admit the truth of my theory! It's all a lie!! A conspiracy!! A propaganda!!
(P.S - the above post was written during one of my more bored moments; I was studying the latest NSS reports. But still, think of it. A state that was once home to the great Ashoka of Kalinga has been steadily neglected for years on end by the Central government. Its people are poor, frustrated, angry (and also largely named Patnaik) and the condition of the state has been steadily deteriorating. Today, Orissa is home to the largest number of Naxalites after Andhra Pradesh and Chhattisgarh, and is a political time bomb. The government better wake up to this sad reality, as to how they are not only excluded from the Budget's sections, but also from the cultural identity of India. We actually hardly know anything about them. My heartfelt sympathies are with the people of Orissa. )
It's a conspiracy. The government of India felt squeamish after Independence and they decided to colour a bit of the Bay of Bengal and call it Orissa so that India would look bigger and more 'in-shape'.
But they can't fool us any longer! Their lies are slowly coming to the fore. They can't fool us anymore about a State that doesn't exist.
Now I know you'll think I've finally gone nuts. But wait! Before you scoff at my seeming delinquency, ask yourselves the following questions:
Have you ever been to Orissa?
Have you ever come back from Orissa?
Have you ever planned to go to Orissa?
Have you ever met anyone from Orissa?
Do you have any idea of what goes on in Orissa?
Ever wonder why it never comes in the news?
Ever wonder why almost everyone connected to Orissa is named 'Patnaik'?
Ever wonder why the government says that all kinds of natural calamities take place there and take hefty donations as foreign aid?
Ever wonder what the hell they speak in Orissa?
If you have answered the majority of these questions with a blank, then you must admit the truth of my theory! It's all a lie!! A conspiracy!! A propaganda!!
(P.S - the above post was written during one of my more bored moments; I was studying the latest NSS reports. But still, think of it. A state that was once home to the great Ashoka of Kalinga has been steadily neglected for years on end by the Central government. Its people are poor, frustrated, angry (and also largely named Patnaik) and the condition of the state has been steadily deteriorating. Today, Orissa is home to the largest number of Naxalites after Andhra Pradesh and Chhattisgarh, and is a political time bomb. The government better wake up to this sad reality, as to how they are not only excluded from the Budget's sections, but also from the cultural identity of India. We actually hardly know anything about them. My heartfelt sympathies are with the people of Orissa. )
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